Open arms
Pondering at a tombMy immediate internal reaction was " oh dear God, this young man took his own life " Now I am not fatalistic or morbid or even a sensationalist. In fact I tried to push this gut reaction out of my mind hoping I was wrong... but I know my gut.... so I set out to gain the facts about his untimely death ... Alexander McQueen who's real first name was Lee had in fact taken his own life. Such a tragedy he was such a young man, he was only 40!
McQueen rocketed to icon status in the fashion industry thanks to his muse a former editor, who sadly also took her own life less than three years ago.
Therefore, I found myself rivited the story as I set out to search for what lessons might be gleaned for the tragic loss of this young man, who was also known as one of fashion's "la enfant terrible."
As I was musing the details of his death online, I came across a poignant interview by an older industry peer who pondered the question of "do we nurture our young talent???" Sadly it seems as if to imply we do not, instead we exploit them to fuel our own fashion fantasy.
Being around the fashion industry so long, I have witnessed other untimely deaths of other talented young men and women such as Patrick Kelly, Willi Smith, Franco Moschino, Versace ( Lady Di) and others. I personally had providential encounters with a few of the older designers who also passed in recent years; Bill Blass and YSL.
Perhaps this why I related so much to my students who were in shock over the loss of an icon. Each generation has its own set of icons and the last two men I listed, had been my inspiration in my youth and during my years of producing knitwear. ( But those God-sighting stories are for another day )
Today, my attention and focus is about all the young "pups' I teach fashion design to that are struggling over the loss of someone like themselves who was so young and vulnerable..... it is about their reaction to death of an icon.
Since the news broke, speculation has been rampant. It appears now as the facts have finally come to light, ...what triggered his hopelessness had been a combination of several tragic losses. First it was the suicide of his muses in recent years, coupled this with the recent death of his beloved mother ( he died before he could even attend her funeral) and sadly the crushing blow was being jilted by his male companion... all together these isolated incidents and rejections formed what seemed to be the perfect storm of loss and tragedy that were far to deep to bear for such a solitary young man.
Here is a copy of my original posting my FACEBOOK which I posted for my students:
The link (no longer available) I provided was the best video tribute I have seen that poses the question...are we really nurturing todays talent?
The interview shows a depth of compassion from an older peer that explores and conveys the vulnerability of artists and the lonely isolation of the top, and implies the need for a strong belief system beyond... the realm of fashion when the storms of life hit....no one is immune...it causes us to reflect who will you turn to when the storms of life hit? Who will be your rock? (end of my Facebook post)
We are all vulnerable to rejection, and loss...it would not take much for any of us to crumble if the perfect storms of life hit us....so I repeat the question to you, as much as I challenge myself....who or what are you serving?
Let's be honest...where your time is, where you money goes, that is where your heart and passion lie. The big question is.... Is your "idol" a safe haven for life's perfect storms?
This young man seem to have had what most of my students crave, ....talent, fame, fortune... but in the end...fashion proved to be not "enough" to save him.
What came to my mind as I ponder the impact on my students as they processed McQueen's death ...were the words of King Solomon...3,500 years ago wrote about looking back over his own life, in the world's eyes one of fame, fortune and success... in his own word he admitted that he had succumbed to the futility of chasing vanity,
Ecclesiastes 12:1
"Remember your Creator
in the days of your youth,
before the days of trouble come..."
Upon first reading you might thing there is no comfort in Solomon's words.....But I ASSURE YOU...This is not a morbid reflection...
Instead it IS one of consolation, in a world of "free will" to "choose who or what we will serve" Solomon concluded like other men of God that the "sun does shine on the good and the bad, as does the rain fall on both" the question is... can God be enough in good times and in tragedy? Did he really "pay a ransom for souls???"
Having walked through my own valley of the shadows of death, I have found myself saying again and again to my own soul...."Lord either answer my questions or BE the answer" "Reveal yourself to ME" "Comfort me,.... be enough!"
As I look back on times where I wondered if God really was far off from my pain, and when I was doubting his wisdom and seemingly lack of intervention, yet I can state with confidence that time and again He has proven to me the value of this passage over the losses and tragedies I have faced. Once when I was really angry with him over the death of a dear artist friend he made the following passage actually make sense to me...it reads
"oh death where is thy victory or death where is thy sting."
In other words, loss and tragedy do not have to have the last say in my life.
That is the beauty of an intimate relationship with God, no one else can reach you where it really hurts...know one knows you like he does...time and again He proves himself to me in ways that no one else can understand...he meets me where I am at and where my need is.
So that is why I am sharing my thoughts today to those dear ones reading this now who may be struggling and feel shattered by the loss of this fragile young man, we may not know until eternity what decisions were uttered by McQueen with his last breath...I can say for sure my hope is that Lee cried out to God...
....but I must turn my focus NOW to the living and my prayer is for those young designers like Lee who are building a life on sinking sand...please what you are really pondering is your own mortality...I urge you to learn from Solomon...learn from McQueen's death .....choose Jesus.... while you are still young. God does want you to be successful .....He does want you to use your talent to the fullest, and He does want you to enjoy the fruit of your labors, but it is all about HIM...eternity is so long to be wrong...our life really amounts to the dash mark between the date of our birth and the date of our death....eternity is so long to be estranged from someone who died for you and loves you so much, he deserves first place in our lives.
Moses said it clearly...."I set before you life and death, blessing and curse...choose life!"
I leave you with one last thought... to not choose...is to choose!
May God comfort and instruct your hearts as you have the courage to confront where your are building your hopes and your future on.
Till next week...
Kathleen
